Well, it's official. Jack Bauer has conceded to both Hillary Clinton in new York and Joe Lieberman in Connecticut. Bauer for Senate 2006 is folding up camp, and making a run for the border. With Nancy Pelosi in charge, there shouldn't be any problem crossing it. Hopefully, this won't be Jack's last foray into politics. If the following excerpts are any indication, Jack really has a knack for the bloodthirsty political game.

Top Ten Things Overheard at Bauer 2006 Campaign Headquarters

10. "Chloe is drowning her sorrows in extra virgin olive oil!"
9. "I can't believe Curtis voted for Ned Lamont."

8. "Who ordered the tuna on toast with extra ricin?"

7. "Our poles are rising. Heh, heh."
6. "Get me the address of Hillary Clinton's parents, right now!"
5. "Mr. Bauer, the concierge wants to know what happened to the piano wire."
4. "If people keep voting for Clinton, I'm gonna take their final exit poll."
3. "Kennedy got re-elected? Those idiots would elect Nina Myers."
2. "Fox News just called the race for Clinton. Would you like your rifle now, Jack?"

And the number one thing overheard at Bauer 2006 Campaign Headquarters is . . .

1. "Only two people voted for me? I kill more than that before 7am!"