Apparently there's some movie coming out about a cartoon family...The Sampsons or something like that. Well I hear that it's pretty popular. Part of their impressive marketing campaign has them teaming up with Burger King to allow people to "Simpsonize" themselves in lovely 2D.
So I Simpsonized Jack Bauer...or Bauerized the Simpsons, however you want to look at it. I know he's been on 24, but this one is my creation.
My made-up Simpson's storyline has Jack Bauer capturing Itchy and tortured him after Scratchy informed Bauer that the little mouse knew something about a hidden nuke. Only after a hilarious routine where Jack tosses Itchy a chunk of cheese with a plutonium isotope pill and he melts down, does he realize that Scratchy is a mole. So Jack takes the melted corpse of Itchy and rams it down Scratchy's throat. Jack then grabs Scratchy's spleen, which is then pulled out and shoved into Scratchy's left ear and out the right one in a flossing manner. The End.
Click Here to Bauerize your own Simpson's scene and we will post them here. Just send Jack Bauer an email and include the picture and a short story if you like.
The date: 7/7/07 10:30am
Word spread that Kwik E-Mart was giving away free Squishees. CTU sent Edgar Stiles to investigate.
The date: 7/7/07 11:30am
Kwik E-Mart announces that there are no more free Squishees, ever. Mission accomplished.
Michelle Dessler (by Steve E)
Even in Simpson's form, Michelle Dessler is drop-dead hot. I'm not feeling all that creative today, but I'll pass along her tracking down some terrorist at the nuclear plant.