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Tuesday, May 09, 2006

JBAD - Your Co-worker is a mole

Jack Bauer Appreciation Day - Guide to Office Politics (Part 1)

Like at CTU, odds are your office is full of moles. Trust me; we don't have a lot of time to explain. Is it the new intern, consultant, freelancer, or all three? It could even be your boss. There are a few signs to tell if they are indeed a mole. I have listed them below.

Signs Your Co-worker Is a Mole
10. They give the new intern the "mole nod" on the way to a meeting.
9. Admits to being a mole after an hour of sensory deprivation.
8. Joins the company softball team and seems to be throwing games.
7. Reformats an Excel spreadsheet without telling you.
6. Steals your Swingline Stapler - theft is a gateway crime.
5. They watched David Blaine last night, instead of 24.
4. Always wants you to try his wife's ricin-roni.
3. Fails to tell you that he/she dropped a "dirty bomb" in the bathroom.
2. Posts comments mocking Blogs4Bauer livebloggers.

and the number 1 sign your co-worker is a mole:
1. They openly supported Marwan last season

If you know more signs - post them in the comments.

The next step is to take out the mole(s). Odds are Human Resources has already been infiltrated. You will need to take matters into your own hands. The Best Ways to Deal With an Office Mole will be posted later today.

9 comments:

kdeweb said...

My office has a mole.

Someone stole my Swingline stapler months ago and never returned it!

I need to get Jack Bauer on the case after he wraps up taking down President Weasel and teaming back up with Tony after it is revealed that he LIVES!

The Man said...

Someone stole my stapler. Fortunatly, I attached a tracking device (my buisness card) to the bottom of the stapler.

NDwalters said...

You know who the mole is when they won't laugh at the "PC LOAD LETTER? WHAT THE F--- DOES THAT MEAN?!?" Joke.

No humor, equals the mole.

Trench said...

I supported Dina Araz last season. She's a TILF. (The T stands for terrorist)

Neal Phenes said...

A new worker that you had never seen before in the prior 4 seasons, I mean years, begins to sleep with the chick no one has ever considered hot or even partly normal (though I really like her). Then when things get wierd, you look at him closely and mole music begins to play. And he goes around the corner to take and make phone calls.

pantrygirl said...

They steal innocent cupcakes from a person's desk.

Oh, and they look like they could be related to Logan. Slimey Miles

sweet jimmy said...

They read blogs4bauer at work instead of actually working. Slackers.

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