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Monday, February 20, 2006

24: Season 5 — 3:00 PM-4:00 PM — Live-Blogging
Friends, Romans, non-hippie countrymen, lend me your eyes.

We're under half an hour from the next hour of 24, and I can assure you that Kim will show up in this episode. (Either that, or we'll have evidence once and for all that I've been bought by Fox to try and drum up anticipation for each week).

So get ready—I'll be back in 20 minutes.

8:45— Okay, so it didn't take 20 minutes... my local Fox affiliate just had an ad for a 10:00 news piece about the purchase of American ports by an Arab company.

Is there anyone else that's having trouble getting worked up about that? Or am I becoming desensitized to political BS?

I'll be back in 15 with all your 24 fun.

3:01 PM—Oops, Badger has gone the way of Firefly. And so did that other guy. We're already up to 2 deaths! At this rate, we're going to see a lot of bloodshed this week.

3:03—And there's 3. And Samwise is whining like a little baby.

3:05—Wait a minute... President Weasel is telling someone to stop making excuses and take responsibility? Didn't he watch last season's DVDs and see what a pathetic whiner he is?

3:07—I like Buchanan more and more. "Jack can be disciplined later, taking him out of the field now is a mistake." That's the first time anyone has had that reaction on this show (aside from maybe Palmer). Smart conclusion.

3:09—Oh no! Cola's turning on Bacardi! And penis-nose (S4GF) is trying to be forecful with Buchanan.

3:11—I want a node-monitor on my cell phone. It'll go perfectly with the CTU ringtone I have.

3:12—And now Bacardi got Cola back! I don't think he killed him, but that was serious. I think that might upset Little Miss Chatterbox, since we all know she's got such a thing for Curtis but doesn't like to see Jack do any wrong.

Ads—Just checked the comments, and lawhawk hit it on the nose, so I've determined that this portion of the liveblog is brought to you by the number 3.

Also, does anyone else hate those "so it's good to go" Taco Bell ads? They make me feel violent.

3:15—Is Samwise really going to devote resources to tracking Jack down? Doesn't he see that as a slightly bad priority?

3:17—Penis-nose redeems herself a little by trying to cover for Jack, but there's no way that'll do anything but raise suspicions that she's a mole. And I guess, at this point, she sort of is a mole—even if it is for the good guys.

3:24—I don't have much to say about that whole thing. I think it's a little ridiculous that there is only one person working with the President to resolve this situation, and that only the two of them would have been listening to that call.

I'm also pretty sure that they should set up a fake motorcade and route rather than aid in an act of war against Russia.

Ads—The Man, what are you talking about? Have you looked at the American curling team? Those women are HOT—how can you even imply that it's difficult to watch them? It's almost as good as an episode of 24 that has Kim in it.

3:28—"Someone is screwing with me, Bill, and I won't tolerate it." What a whiny bitch.

3:29—"If someone has a hidden agenda, I want to know about it." Wouldn't that be an impossibility if it actually is a "hidden" agenda?

3:31—Jack's good, anticipating the danger for the guy on the other end of the phone. We need a nickname for him—right now I'm leaning towards Jack Bristow, but I'm open to other suggestions.

3:33—Number 4, hostile chasing Bristow. Major firefight—it's a good thing that bad guys can't ever hit a good guy even with automatic weapons when he's out in the open.

Oops, spoke too soon—they got him good there.

Where'd Bauer get a gun? I thought Curtis took his? Or did he take it back and I missed it?

3:34—Wow. Jack just took down a Sikorsky with a handgun. Sweet.

3:36—Wait, Jack took out three of the bad guys? Stupid liveblogging, I totally missed it.

3:38—We've always known that Jack can count on Audrey. Here's a question, though: does anyone remember how pissed off she got when this year's mole said he thought he was doing the right thing by violating protocols to obey the White House Chief of Staff? How many times now has she violated protocols to obey Jack? I'm just saying, it's a little hypocritical.

Ads—Treo 700 ad. Think they've been reading Blogs4Bauer and decided this woudl be a good show to advertise on, even though Jack's phone is from Sprint?

Oh yeah, and I guess we didn't need a nickname, since Bristow's dead now. The Man, are you keeping count? I've lost track. Again: stupid liveblogging.

3:43—I'm sorry, I know everybody here likes First Lady Weasel, but there is no justification on the planet for a First Lady to be a part of this conversation.

3:45—She is right, though. You can't do what the terrorists want even once. Why? If you give a mouse a cookie...

3:48—Samwise really is a screw-up. That's all I have to say about that.

Ads—Could just be me, but V for Vendetta looks pretty much to be The Matrix mixed with A Brave New World. Still, that could be a really good mixture.

Another local news ad—and I'm still ok with the ports being run by an Arab company. Eew. Chloe should not be talking about nudity. I really hope it's not her or Penis-nose. That would be a great way for Kim to return, though...

3:56—A friendly Russian? Do those exist?

3:57—Whoa, did anyone else catch that look between the two First Ladies? "Thank you for your hospitality." What kind of hospitality could that be, if you get my meaning...

3:59—Wait, what does the First Lady think she can accomplish by riding into the kill zone? And good for whats-his-name the Secret Service guy. At least somebody knows what his job is and sticks to it.

Well, that's that. Next week, we have Cola threatening a Red Shirt when Samwise tries to have him arrested. Sweet.

And yes, The Man, Fox5 is reporting that there will be nudity on 24. I'll watch Fox5 News at 10 and post an update here when we get more details.

50 comments:

Citizen Grim said...

Sasha Cohen is the mole!

The Man said...

MY FAST SAYS KIM NEEDS TO BE IN THIS EPISODE.

The Man said...

World's longest reacap of a previous episode.

Citizen Grim said...

Badger down! Badger down!

The Man said...

1 Badger - Stabbed

Badger Killer

The Man said...

2 - Nerd - shot by Badguy

It is a bloodbath Aunti Em. A Bloodbath.

The Man said...

3 dead before the credits are done rolling.

lawhawk said...

Dang, 2 dead? So soon... We're gonna need another trailer of body bags at this rate....

lawhawk said...

I'm starting to feel like The Count on Sesame Street. Three... three dead guys.. ah ah ah ....

The Man said...

P-o-t-a-t-o-s

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

The hobbit is an idiot!!!!!!!

mizerock said...

Oh hell, we had on ice dancing (!!) too long, what did I miss? Who killed Badger & how & where & who saw it?

Did Frasier CRane here in the car kill Badger?

The Man said...

It is good to see Jack has kept his Blue Blocker shades.

The Man said...

WTF = Barcadi and Cola don't mix.

Citizen Grim said...

dangit! there has to be a better way than beating up Curtis! a simple "please" is too much to ask?

work out a lie between the two of you, I dont care, just dont leave Curtis lying by the side of the road like a Seattle prostitute!

The Man said...

MY FAST DOES NOT LIKE COLA GIVING ME RELATIONSHIP ADVICE.

mizerock said...

What a tangled web we weave!

mizerock said...

I hate the Taco Bell commercial with slow romantic music even more.

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

RFTR: Where did you get the idea I had a thing for Curtis? You are cracking me up. I have a thing for Jack but I do like Curtis and wasn't happy about Jack knocking him out. But whatever Jack does, he has a reason :-)

The Man said...

Watching Logan make decisions is more painful than watching 3 hours of curling.

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

The Man: You said it about watching Logan being painful. I miss Palmer sooooooo much!!! He would've told that terrorist to stick it where the sun doesn't shine :-).

mizerock said...

Real Politik = Might is Right (?)

The Man said...

Samwise: CTU has become way too porous.

Understatement of the year

The Man said...

4 - bad guy - Nathan
5,6 - bad Guy - Jack
7 - Nathan - Bad guys

Jack just shot down a helicopter with a handgun....wtF?

lawhawk said...

We've got bodies.... and what does Jack use? Armor piercing? That helicopter is toast!?

The Man said...

Jack's TREO 650 is back. I guess it was not a 700W from Verizon afterall.

lawhawk said...

Bristow would never have been caught in the open like that, though he *did* have that resemblance.

Citizen Grim said...

Realpolitik is pretty much opposed (rightly) by liberals and conservatives nowadays.

although the Nixon administration could be considered a "realpolitik" one.

Realpolitik sees nothing wrong with upholding dictators in the Middle East, so long as it maintains stability, for example.

Machiavelli and notions like "might makes right" would fall under realpolitik. although that shouldnt be confused with "right makes might" which is more of an Abe Lincoln maxim

The Man said...

Who votes to NOT invite Lynn to the CTU Christmas party?

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

Lahawk: Good point about Bristow!!

The Man: I vote not to have the hobbit at CTU period!!!

lawhawk said...

Hmmm.. a room with 2 guys and one gal, and only the gal has the stones to do the right thing? Figures. Logan's a weenie. Bigtime.

Citizen Grim said...

fat stupid hobbitses power struggles!! damn your eyes!


V for Vendetta!


hooray for Mrs. Logan wearing the pants in that relationship!

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

Lawhawk: You said it!!!!!

Have I mentioned I hate the hobbit?!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!

DixieDarlin' said...

Red shirt security??? What was that old Star Trek theme...red shirt in the morning, crewman take warning?

Citizen Grim said...

What's the kill count now anyway? Seven?

Did you hear them asking for Stupid Fat Hobbitses key card? too bad they didnt press him!

lawhawk said...

The Hobbit is in the thrall of the One True Ring... to rule them all.

He's paranoid. Seriously paranoid.

mizerock said...

There is no Kim. Not now, not ever. This is bogus.

The Man said...

Fox5News Preview

Even President Logan would not let UAE operate our ports.

lawhawk said...

The First Lady is more like a co-president (shades of a certain former Prez anyone?)

mizerock said...

Yep, just like Nancy Reagan!

Citizen Grim said...

good work Mrs Logan!

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

Impeach President Logan and shoot the Hobbit!!!!!!!

The Man said...

Ha. Terrorists watch FoxNews

Little Miss Chatterbox said...

RFTR: Please find a better nickname for Audrey. Penis-nose isn't working for me at all. Everytime I see it, its like nails on a chalkboard.

The Man said...

RFTR: Did Fox5 just say that nudity is the future of 24?

Citizen Grim said...

The First Lady's strategy is that if she's riding with the Russians, Pres Logan will actually have to stand up to the terrorists.

I think she underestimates his sleazily weazilyness.

And Aaron is the name of the Secret Service agent, I believe.


and has anyone noticed how tacky the furniture at the President's ranch is? wtf?

PoPo 101 said...

Come on guys... Rudy is only at CTU to help President Loser do an unknown plan...They both have the same vibe of losing control but in fact they're planning to butfuck us!

Citizen Grim said...

Nudity on 24 can only mean one thing:

Fox has received all one hundred and thirty-seven of your letters concerning Kim Bauer, and has decided to answer your every wish to the letter

The Man said...

Remember that fat guy on NYPD Blue bared his ass. Please tell me they don't show Edgar's butt on the next episode.

RFTR said...

Citizen Grim, what makes you think we sent 137 letters?

You should all know an important fact that applies to both The Man and to myself: we don't do anything half-assed.

If we were only going to send 137 letters, why would we have bothered in the first place?