After spending a season in the peanut gallery, I've been elevated by The Man to help out with the blogging chores around here. My dossier can be found at A Blog For All. Jack's a busy guy and considering all the help that CTU provides, every little bit helps.
When last we left Jack, he was contemplating quitting CTU and questioning life when a flash of brilliance appeared on the horizon. Actually, the flash was a nuclear blast as the Red Shirt Tac Team can't stop a nuclear bomb from going off. CTU finds out there are four more of the bombs waiting to ruin someone else's day. That provides a clarifying moment for Jack, who realizes that no one else in the country knows how to kill terrorists better than he does. Well, except for maybe Curtis (who's now dead because he threatened to kill Bashir the Islamic turncoat terrorist).
Questions to ponder: What will be the body count from the nuclear bomb that went off in the prior hour? Will Jack be able to get from point A to B in and around the newly irradiated Los Angeles region without so much as a traffic jam? Will chaos erupt preventing Jack from getting the job done? Has the nuclear fallout prevent McDreamy from having perfect hair and bedding Meredith and convinced Izzy that she needs to spend her millions? Oh wait, wrong show.
Anyhow, back to Jack - he's got a tall task ahead of him and without Cola, he's going to have to rely upon his new favorite drink - Dr. Bashir.
Tick Tick Tick...
I guess tonight's commercial of choice will be Ghost Rider? Just what the world needs - another Marvel cartoon reduced to Nicholas Cage proportions? Last week, it was 300... guess they didn't have enough Spartans to cover more than the pass at Thermopylae.
They're doing the recap... so we get to relive the worst moment of the season - Curtis dying followed moments later by the nuke going off...
10:00 - The unthinkable has happened? Oh really? Do they forget another nuke that went off in the desert because Jack stopped it from going off in Los Angeles?
No less than 12,000 dead.
To the Batcave for Palmer. All the CTU LA field teams too close to Ground Zero? All dead?
Potato Face wonders why all the people she works with keep dying? Because you work for an outfit whose security sucks? Who have more moles than a cornfield, and because you're not working at Initech?
Traffic seems to be pretty typical for Los Angeles.
Evil dudes talking.
10:09 Bauer goes to help dude who saw a helicopter crash after being hit by a shockwave. Guess it was cheaper than having a bunch of airplanes falling out of the sky. In the nick of time too...
Jack's back - he's back in. Chiggy must be so relieved to hear that. ...
10:16 - Meeting at the Bat Cave. Awww. Other countries extend their condolences and offer their assistance. First question - where are the carriers.
These people want to live in the Stone Age? Let's put them there.
10:17 - the Visitor is on the move. Bashir finally meets Chiggy. Chiggy is not impressed.
Bashir wonders how Fayed managed to put together the visiting team. Russians involved? tick tick tick...
10:25 - Technoweenies fighting over the best way to get intel. Al Bundy plays my hero.
Philip Bauer? Jack had a dad? Here I thought he sprung fully formed from the forehead of the Gods.
And we now get to club Gitmo. Obama is already in there, and the FBI wants to put a wire on him. Get the feeling that Chief Wiggums is the one behind the mike?
So, Obama now has the wire and Obama has a little wear and tear - nothing that the 15,000 tuneup can't fix.
Jack is trying to get in touch with dad. I guess dad's nickname is going to be Oddball. Just watch out for the negative waves.
10:31 Liddy just spoke to Rocket Romano, who happens to be Bauer's brother? Are you kidding me? This isn't good at all. Not good at all.
Now, let this all sink in. The top terrorist and the guy who wants Jack dead more than anyone else in the world is dear old brother. Rocket Romano. The one armed wonder.
As per the comments, Obama's new nickname will be Locke - who never does truly believe.
10:36 - Hi. How are you? How are you doing? How's the weather? What's new and exciting?
BTW, anyone else notice that all the traffic is non existent?
Hmmm... love triangle? Awww. How cute.
10:39 - How best to spin the terrorist detonation of a nuclear device in Los Angeles. Lovely. Sugar coat it. More aggressive measures. Deportation. Ah, embracing the politics of fear. Saving the nation from extinction.
How many talking points can I cram into one scene?
What took you so long? Gee, honey, a nuclear bomb went off. What do you want me to say?
Good news within the hour? The other bombs going off as scheduled... 10:45....
10:49... Back at CTU, Bashir is trying to convince them that he's for real. But the President wants him in DC. Why? Chiggy gives the handshake...
FBI just upgraded its lead - Locke is providing deep cover intel. The jihadis aren't entirely convinced Locke is a true believer or not. Locke took the initiative himself. Sherry Clone doesn't like all this going down.
We should get to know each other. Do lunch. It's the LA kind of thing to do. Meet you at Spago? Locke is laying on a story nice and thick. He knows Jack Valenti and the guys at the MPAA - they'll know what to do.
The brothers meet at last. Jack is at the disadvantage because he doesn't realize that Rocket is a bad guy. A real bad guy. Weird day. LA-speak for holy frickin $#!t!
I want information and then I'll leave.
Where's dad. Jack's trying to do this gently. Romano isn't buying. Try again. 10:56...
I need information or else I'll start hurting you. Trust me. Jack's not.
Cut to the Bat Cave and Palmer is looking pretty wigged out trying to collect his thoughts before going on TV trying to explain what the country will do next. The long walk to the desk.
... My fellow Americans... What are we going to do about this...
Jack wants the truth. Romano can't handle Jack's kind of truth....
Romano is about to get a lesson in oxygen deprivation. Will he be a quick learner? Stay tuned... 11:00 tick tick tick
Good night. And good luck.
Well, that ends my inaugural live blog. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.