The wife decided she could not handle an hour of NFL football and then another 2 hours of 24. So I will be your LiveBlogging guide to the premier of 24.
Remember to follow these simple rules:
1. If you are new to Blogs4Bauer - If you hear us talk about Bacardi and Cola, Red Foreman, and Chiggy Killer and you have no idea what we are talking about. Check out our Guide to B4B Nicknames.
2. When we start adding up kills and talk about Jack Bauer getting "bonus points", make sure you read up on our Blogs4Bauer Kill Counter Guidelines.
3. Have fun, 24 is a great TV show and we have a pretty good time with it. Oh and Jack Bauer is our Elvis, Kim Bauer is hot, and Audrey has a penis nose.
4. Remember that tomorrow is Talk Like Jack Bauer Day.
5. Drink whenever Jack says "dammit".
Live Blogging Preview
-Let me be the first to say....enough with the 24 commercials FOX!!!
-Anyone see Reggie Bush get knocked into last Tuesday during the Saints game? You know you are too into 24 when you saw that hit and thought to yourself....Jack Bauer has taken worse.
-You know you are too into 24 when your wife tells you to take Route 24 today and you reply to her that "yes, 24 does come on tonight". True story.
-You know you are too into 24 when it looks like you will miss out on the final few minutes of a NFL playoff game in order to watch Jack Bauer bite someones neck....or so I've been told.
Live Blogging Hour 1
-Remote - check
-Phone off the hook - check
-Dog medicated - check
-Wife over at the in-laws - check
Jack Bauer was on The Simpsons...."Front line infantry"
tck....tck.....tck
6:00am
900 people dead? Car bomb in New York....Muslims late for work.... I love 24
BOOOOOOMMMMM 23 more dead.
"Lock up everyone who prays to Mecca"? Is Sean Hannity president?
President Wayne Palmer.... When does he do his first Allstate commercial?
Failure? With CTU involved? No you have to be joking?
Chloe...swwwwiiinnnnggg Kim Bauer who?
"Morris we are at work....meet me in Conference Room B in 20"
Jack's coming back and he is going to love your new haircut/killing Aaarrabbs.
We don't know his state of mind? When have we ever?
Did someone order a #43 with a side of homicidal maniac?
"Jack Bauer did not breath (or pee) for 2 years..."
Jack forced to die for CTU in the first 10 minutes? What are we going to do for the next 23 hours and 50 minutes? Oh right.
JACK BAUER'S FIRST WORDS IN 2 YEARS? "Where is Penis Nose"? What did those Chinese bastards do to him?
Commercial Break
Someone give me a Pats update! Pats up 3 with 1:10 left.... DAMMMITT
While Imm happy that movie 300 gave us more photos on Myspace, I will still never go see that stupid movie.
Tckkk...
LA hit by terrorists.......Personally I'm glad that I'm not counting each kill on the kill counter. Maybe we should count Chloe's bitchy comments...1,2,3,4...
I smell mole......Hot muslim chick is a mole. Chloe will steal her keycard, log into her computer and check her Myspace page and see if Assad is in her top 8.
Jack flew from China, drove from the airport, had the sun rise, and are almost at CTU in less than 20 minutes. He hasn't lost a beat. But will he remember how to use a cell phone? Yes.
Jack Bauer handcuffed to a grate with no cellphone? That poor grate. What did that grate ever do to deserve this?
6:30.......
Let me just say that 24 is awesome. Watching 24 on HDTV is really awesome.
Pats - 24 Chargers - 21
Audrey was on that lame show The Nine (which I think only lasted a few weeks). Michelle Dessler was on The Knights of Prosperity last week (equally lame).
6:36...
Drudge is livebloging?
Someone's attacking Behrooz? Dude, I think we should smoke some weed and blow up a White Castle...I mean eat...
New Evil Guy's nickname: Mr. Abu Al-Clean
6:46
Jack is so screwed and Prison Break's return means the absolute end to all of my Monday nights.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh I think Jack likes this torture.
6:57
Jack Bauer is dead? Tyler D...you killed him. Chloe... you too. Morris...grow some hair...
Kill Counter
Jack Bauer kills using his mouth (4 points)
He didn't say anything cool or have on aviators. However, he probably has not brushed his teeth in 2 years, so his breath had to be torture.
Jack Bauer vampire. Lestat is a sissy.
Kill Counter Hour 1 Total = 4 Points
Live Blogging Hour 2
Previously on 24, a bunch of B-rate actors from movies you have never seen are on your favorite show.
7:00
Jack is stuck in the LA sewers... He grabs one of Rosie Odonnell's diaprams and floats to CTU.
Jack Bauer could have started that car with his finger.
President Palmer to Bauer: Sorry I tried to have you killed....its this damn Palmer blood that is running through my veins.
Product Placement: Nextel.
The racist neighbor was right, his muslim target is a terrorist. I love Fox....sometimes
Someone called in the US Marines....the next best thing after Jack Bauer.
7:10 - first Token mention. Did someone order a Bacardi and Cola?
Why does Jack introduce himself? There is a mole inside the terrorist group? I see they have the same writers from the past 5 seasons.
Boooooommmm
7:15
If Jack Bauer was dropped from a crane, he would come out in China. In fact, that is how the Chinese really returned Jack Bauer to America. They dropped him from a crane in Bejing and he popped up in LA.
7:19
"There are no terrorists here"..... 24 Rules says "There are terrrorists here"
Sandra, stop being like Sherry Palmer and help us out. Civil protections, Bush is evil, war for oil..... There are always people looking out for the rights of others/terrorists.
Is that Barack Obama? Talk about overexposure.
"Respond he will guaranteed" - what is he? Yoda?
7:26
This season of 24 will setback images of muslims something like 2 years. We have come so far...
If I never see that stupid SHARP golf commercial again... I thought I'd seen it the last of it during the World Series when they had it in every commercial rotation.
7:31
In case you are just joining us, Jack Bauer is helping out terrorists. Now stop asking what the hell is going on.
Bauer: "WHERE IS HE!!!" .... everyone drink never mind, he didn't say "We are running out of time".
In the kneecap.....oooooohhhhh Camel Nuts that hurts.
American flag in the background as we see some torture scenes....24 brought to you by The New York Times.
7:37
"I don't know how to do this anymore" - Jack Bauer. Oh crap, America is so screwed. Jack Bauer doesn't torture, another Hannibal movie is coming out, the Patriots are going to the AFC Championship. What do I have to live for? Oh right; Prison Break returns soon and we can make fun of retards on American Idol.
7:41
Obama calls Palmer. The FBI is back and they want to ask questions about my People magazine photoshoot.
Roger Clinton meet Sandra Palmer.
BANG... Some noname from Harold and Kumar just shot the catcher from Major League 2. Any minute now, the cast of Weekend at Bernies will show up and we will all have a good laugh.
6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Rube Baker was the catcher for the Cleveland Indians in Major League 2....President Palmer played outfield. Dennis Haysbert was in What's Cooking? (2000) with Maury Chaykin Maury Chaykin was in Where the Truth Lies (2005) with Kevin Bacon
7:50
Product Placement: Toyota
Those are some clean subways. Are you watching New York?
I'd hate to be a muslim on the subway on Tuesday....someone is going to get their bag checked.
Only Jack Bauer gets a free subway ride by claiming a terrorist is on board.
BOOOOOMMMMMMM
Kill Counter
Jack Bauer killed an arab with explosives/feet (1 point)
"we have no way to fight back"....J-A-C-K- do I need to continue spelling?
7:58...7:59
Seriously...with the constant attacks on our country, why do we elect Palmers?
Fox has some really stupid commercials for movies and TV shows that we will just have to put up with. My suggestion is liberal use of the MUTE button.
Final Kill Counter Total for Hours 1-2: 5 points
Tomorrow: The Kill Counter will get some nice pointage as Jack Bauer claims that he "can't do this anymore"...until someone pisses him off. Then he tends to go overboard.
If you live in the NY area....it is that time of year when the Fox5 News team like to tease a 24-related story and hold on until after the last story to broadcast it. I hate that.
Remember. Tomorrow is Talk Like Jack Bauer Day
Finally, welcome back to Blogs4Bauer. Last season we took watching 24 to a new level. This season we have added some new bloggers and a new layout. Stay tuned for TiVO blogging Point/Counterpoints, Caption Contests, Kim Bauer, and did I mention Kim Bauer.
Thank you, the 24 fan, for helping fuel our obsession.
169 comments:
The commercials have been a bit in the overkill department.
But the funniest thing was in the Bears/Seahawks game when it was tied at 24 and the announcer pimped 24.
Did you see the Eagles Saints game where Fox showed some woman in the stands wearing a shirt that said "F*** Da Eagles" (without the asterisks)?
I am watching the Pats-Chargers game and it is Jack Bauer-free.
Jack Bauer makes Chuck Norris look like a girlyman.
Chloe gives me a chubby.
Jack Bauer would have made Reggie Bush crawl off the field last night and stay off.
To those who visited B4B last season...How do you like the new layout?
Big thanks to RFTR and Bright and Early for the template changes.
You know you are too into 24 when it looks like you will miss out on the final few minutes of an NFL play off game in order to see every single second of 24 and you don't even care about the game.
Did you know that the new header shows up as * - * in IE, but as
*
-
*
in Firefox? I haven't taken a look yet. Been working on the bR&E Forum. Sorry.
Tom Brady hasn't been tortured by China for 2 years.
It wouldn't have been right if you weren't here to live blog 24 The Man.
If I were doing this, the fun factor would have been watching me pilot the plane after Jack bails out right before realizing I'm carrying a nuke in the cabin. A blaze of glory indeed.
Lawhawk - You will always be my George Mason.
Did some see the sign urging Chigago to "PLay like Jack Bauer"?
That and the comfort in knowing that I went home to Nina Meyers every nite I'm sure....
My son is going to kill me. The TiVo just switched to FOX on the good tv and the Pats/Chargers are tied at 21 in the 4th.
I would feel shame, but nothing comes before Jack Bauer.
I miss Edgar.
Gee, can't they find CTU types who actually get along?
GF?! Chloe sexed up... and is with Morris?
Can we call Chloe's boyfriend "Al Bundy" since they both sold women's shoes.
Who are the guns for?
Jack or the Chinese?
Click Here NOW
nicky:
I second that one...
And what did Palmer give up to secure Bauer's release?
Nice to see Cola and Chiggy doing well... Jack? Not so good.
Where is the CAIR statement on muslims we had before Season 4?
The Man:
The statement will be delivered in 24...23...22...21...
Hey, that looked like someone treated Jack's back as a chew toy. Torture even.
When this season is over, you can be sure Jack's gonna find some Chinese payback.
Jack could use some Iodine and a haircut.
The Man is asking for trouble with the Sean Hannity crack :-).
I'm soooo feeling Jack Bauer's pain and not liking this at all.
Audrey, yuck!!
Where do I know the new head CTU chic from????
I think you can count on China dude winding up dead by the end of the day.
That look Jack gave him was his warning to RUN!!!!
Kimberly is right about Jack getting payback on the China dude!!!
Office politics. That and blackmail will get you far.
MMMOOOOLLLLLEEEE
Jack Bauer, President Palmer, Muslim terrorists....this all sounds so Season 4.
Notice that noone says "goodbye" on the cell phone calls.
How many times has Jack Bauer agreed to sacrifice his life for the U.S.? We should have a counter for that.
I like the new layout by the way but its hard to get used to.
What movie was that White House aide in?
I don't know but he's a dork!!
SON OF A BITCH, I WAS WATCHING THE PATS GAME AND MISSED THE FIRST 20 MIN!!!!1
peter macnichol? He's in numbers... and was also in ghostbusters 2
Every time I think about Jack being asked to sacrifice his life, I think about Ryan Chapelle.
He wasn't killed in the line of fire. He was just flat out assassinated. And he did it willingly!
....I can die for something.
If I never hear that line again, I will die a happy man.
How can you not love Jack Bauer????? He's willing to die for his country.
....I can die for something.
If I never hear that line again, I will die a happy man.
----
Well, that IS something!
:D
Today.. I can die for something...
and if I have my way, I'll make last year's body count look like child's play.
Yah, but no one liked Ryan Chappelle.
Jack Bauer liked offing Ryan Chappelle and cutting off Chase Edmunds hand.
Drudge has a 24 scoop - possible low yield nukes on American soil.
Developing...
That Morris better keep his hands off my Chole.
Is that Behrooz?
The writers of this show are supposed to be conservative, why are we getting all this pc crap????
What movie was Sam in?
That is Kumar!
Harold & Kumar go to White Castle
Ready Kill Counters...
The writers of this show are supposed to be conservative, why are we getting all this pc crap????
--------
It could be because of our new liberal overlords in Congress?!
i have mentioned I have already seen this no?
Tyler....is a mole
The thought of the National Security chic and Buchanan together--Ewwwwww!!
I like Karen. I love Bill.
But they are no Tony and Michelle.
:sigh:
Jack Bauer has a heartbeat?
So, how will Jack get out of this?
First, he's gonna use the dude as a human shield, then I gonna kill that guard over there, with the Patterson trocar on the table. Then I was thinking about breaking the other guy's neck.
So, Dr. Bashir is going to be a good guy?
Not even close to Tony & Michelle!!
Its time for Jack Bauer to kick some butt!!!!!!!!!!
Mr. Clean just gave Jack a reason to live! Big mistake. Huge!
And Vamp Jack will not be staked!!!
Thats a 4 pointer
Update the counter!! How many points for death-by-dracula?
Wow.... sweet jebus... the jaws of death...
Richard Kiel has competition.
Kiefer Sutherland is reliving his "Lost Boys" days!!!
I need a laptop. The Computer is on one side of the house, the Good TV is upstairs on the other side.
I'm getting a workout!
You mean... Count "JACK"ula!
Also, anyone seen National Lampoon's Van Wilder? Taj is back!!
"Lost Boys" Good call.
Where is Corey Haim when you need him?
aww..c'mon.. not Taj!!! What would Van Wilder think?
bright & early, when you do it for 24 hours without a bathroom break then you can talk.
Perhaps if you had a Type A shake it might help you keep up your strength?
Why do people second guess Bauer?
I hate Karen & the dorky aide!!!!!!!!
i dont like watching torture, especially of good guys....that's why i could never watch Hostel.
It boggles the mind.
They always think they know better than Jack and they NEVER do!
Nextel
If they didn't second guess Bauer, there wouldn't be a show.
It would be news if Bauer was wrong. Even just for a nanosecond.
That guy does kind of look like Behrooz.
Look in the sky... it's a bird, it's a plane.... it's 2 cobra attack helicopters.....
I wont count that as a kill.
Ah, it's Dr. Bashir...
Nother mole
Aw, the terrorists have moles too!
It is some common ground.
Target destroyed? I don't think so. A building was blow'd up real good though. The boys in pyro earned their pay today.
LOL :-) Good one Kimberly!!
Okay, its really bugging me. Somebody has to know who the new head chic at CTU is. She has been in something recently and I can't remember what it is. Anybody know what her real name is?
House is so much more of a dick than Dr. Bashir ever was.
Okay, who invited CAIR to infiltrate 24?
And an Ozzie too. Cyril!!
ooooo.... another Palmer sibling?
Sandra Palmer? How many Palmers are there on this show? Where is Sherry?
Dead...that's right.
What simply kimberly said: and it was one hell of a Game; can't believe the Pats pulled it out!
Carson Palmer? Is he part of the family?
Preach it sista!
President Palmer, I knew David Palmer. I was in a movie with David Palmer (62 below Dennis Haysbert). You, sir, are no David Palmer
Is that Obama?
I smell set up. I am calling it now. She has the job because of who she is and to help cover up their terrorist activity.
"Respond he will guaranteed" = what is he? Yoda?
This season of 24 will setback images of muslims something like 2 years. We have come so far...
Bright & Early--good one!!
I think Obama is the terrorist at CAIR.
What is it with the writers in this show and women? They always treat 'em as treacherous and traitorous types...
And she's a Palmer, but I'm repeating myself.
Don't stare at Jack's scars... you don't have the right...
Hayes and Chiggy are married? Oh, that's not going to end well either...
Bill is the only suit that has ever gotten Jack.
You said it Lahawk!!
Jack Bauer lost his nerve....
Did Jack just get one-upped by Dr. Bashir?
That little terrorist Oprah moment made me throw up a little.
Jack Bauer has lost his will to torture, say it isn't so!!
I don't know how to do this anymore?
I don't know how to do this any more.
I'm betting it comes back to him real quick.
Dr. Bashir just showed Jack Bauer how to torture. This is the new dynamic duo.
Has Jack Bauer turned into Austin Powers? Has Jack lost his mojo?
Stay tuned...
Bashir and Bauer. We need a new nickname...
Bacardi and Curry?
Check out this disturbing image:
http://blogs.herald.com/dave_barrys_blog/2007/01/24_advisory_1.html
And if you are the attorney... wouldn't you want to be there while these agents are going through the files?
And like clockwork, Mrs. Palmer is hacking away... lawyer and hacker? No Way.
And arrest her.
Another female Palmer being a pain in the ass.
This "Ms. ACLU" crap is getting on my nerves.
Arrest her and have them interrogate her in 25 hours or so.
THAT DUDE WAS IN MAJOR LEAGUE 2
Racist Redneck saves the day!! Or not....
"But you said we'd eat sliders together...."
Kumar just pulled his massive bag of weed out of the wall.
Don't touch my weed!!!
How am I gonna get to White Castle with this shard of glass in my leg?
That was....Rube Baker
He was in Major League III as well. Eric Bruskotter, aka Rube Baker.
VtheK is going to have a field day with nicknames this season.
The liveblogging has been strong to quite strong tonight!
All airport screener should be forced to watch 24.
Holy clean subways....
Simply Kimberly...
Thank you. Mind you that I am also doing laundry and had to field a phone call from my mom.
Bring back Soul Patch!
Jack Bauer should not be teaming up with terrorists.
It is just so wrong.
A car chase with that POS hybrid???
Everyone knows the name of Jack Bauer.
The bomber looks like a young Cramer
SWEET! Every suicide bomber needs to die that way - fruitlessly!
Oh snap! Jack is just using all his body parts tonight.
The swift double kick of death.
For a moment there, I thought I saw Bruce Willis and Die Hard with a Vengeance.
How does a president say "DOH!" ??
Jack is ALWAYS right.
When are these pinheads gonna finally get that? Day 600?
I miss Tony.
I miss Tony too!! And David Palmer because he would've listened to Jack!
I finally figured out where I'd seen the head ctu chic from. She was in that show "Blind Justice" that was only on for 6 months where she was the blind cop's partner.
Oh yea, GO PATS!!!!
She was in that show "Blind Justice".
Now, see that didn't help one little bit. What show was that again?
You probably don't remember it because it wasn't on long although I thought it was a good show. It came on right after NYPD Blue ended their series.
You're not the only one The Man. Here in Ohio, our Fox28 newsteam is going to be doing a story on 24 websites.
Little Miss-
You do know that Ricky Shroeder will be on this season....
Stop sweating for Tony...he's dead.
OhioGuy28
-Maybe they will say someting about B4B. We are the only 24-related website right? No?
Don't give up on Tony yet...
Rumor has it that halfway through the season, Jack goes to a voodoo priestess and has her resurrect him... Tony can't resist the call of Jack!
John Edwards is a douchebag
Assad is a former Star Trek:Voyager character, as is the blonde guy who arrested Palmer's sister. What...Jack is so tough that they have to get people from the future to handle him? As if a phaser could affect Jack.
Tony is NOT dead.
He is part of a covert ops group that faked his death and he will return at some point.
I am sure of it.
If there is hope for Tony...then why not bring back Truffle Shuffle?
*Respond he will guaranteed" - what is he? Yoda?*
I spend too much time here! This is exactly what I said when I heard that line.
Look, I only have the time and energy to hope for one to come back from the dead.
Don't be putting more pressure on me.
Tony is my favorite 24 character. So, he gets my attention.
To be fair, we never gave Tony the "red X". So there is hope. Sure...and some lady will die by drinking too much water trying to win a Nintendo.
Oopps.
Kill Counter for tonight: 5 points
The Man's guess: 5 points
Who's bad?
That had to be the most gruesome Bauer kill yet...bare teeth and a jugular.
And my Pats went for the jugular, too. What a stunning finish!
Vamp Jack was just so good. He takes a bite out of crime.
If we see any of the Lost Boys popping up this season I am gonna get worried though.
Simply Kimberly
-We had Sean Astin last season. Why not throw in Corey Haim this season.
To Mrs. Who
Assad was a former Star Trek:DS9 character. Not Voyager. He was Bashir.
Who is the hero of this show? I admire the CAIR lawyer.
Thanks to last week's leak I could finally follow liveblogging (I live in Mexico and don't get S6 on TV until march. That's a crime)
Jack's kill is just brutal.....but then he fails to torture an arab (His favorites). The day JAck really fails will be doomsday for mankind..
Can't wait for tomorrow.
The vampire Jack bit... it was almost worth the wait since last May... almost... still it's a definitely going to be a great season - that's for sure!!
Seeing Kumar thrown through the table made it worth the wait -"this is for Van Wilder!!"
now, my life is all about getting my next 1-2 hour fix every week... goll dang fox!! just run the whole thing as a 2 week miniseries and give me my life back
Looks like Jack and Assad have survived until tomorrow at least, so should we give them a "Bacardi and Cola" style nickname yet? Does Bacardi go well with Iced Tea?
To Timmay:
*smacks self in forehead*
I knew that. Jack just had me a little too excited!
What's up with the Biscuit as the eeeeevil presidential advisor?
Spam sucks
hmm ...
i've watched all of the previous 24 seasons ...
i thinks its kinda good show ...
but lately the jack bauer's family invlovement ...
has made me dislike it a bit ...
my take on 24 is available on my blog at ...
www.subcorpus.net/blog/
check it out ...
Atomic SEO I really like this blog when I first signed up here i wasn't sure were to post...
Great Post! Wish I would have found it sooner! 8^)
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