Imhotep decides the time is right to call the president and make his demands. "Mr. President, we are prepared to offer a ceasefire." Chapelle responds, "Well, I know last time, you were just manipulating us to eliminate a rival leader, and you still carried out terrorist attacks after we fully complied, but I've got a really good feeling about this time."
Imhotep relays his terms: "You are holding 110 prisoners at Palmdale Air Base. Release them, and I promise to stop terrorizing your country." Chapelle says he'll think about it. Now, Gloria Allred wises up. "I can't believe this is Imhotep's endgame." Barbara Boxer slaps her for expressing an opinion without having children.
Back at CTU, Chiggy reports 122 dead in
Jack, still in his handsome long john shirt, still all grim and goth from his 20 months at the Beijing State Pen jumps into a car with Bashir, forming the team of Bacardi and Synthehol. They are still following the Handler. Jack checks the map, "Oh, snap! He's headed north. We'll never be able to tail him." Jack calls CTU and asks Chiggy Killer for surveillance assistance. Chiggy tells Russet Potato Face to get on it, and tells Jack about Imhotep's offer. Jack grimly tells Chiggy to get him some Cola to mix with his Bacardi, and tells him he doesn't think they can trust Imhotep (the bad terrorist) but they can trust Bashir (the good terrorist). Russet Potato Face, for once, can not get access to a surveillance satellite. So, Jack has to improvise.
Jack grimly carjacks a white Ford Bronco from OJ Simpson and Al Cowlings, and using simple defensive driving techniques well-known to any
08:21:44 to 08:27:57
Back at CTU, Bundy asks Russet Potato Face, "Why do you always have to take his side, Peg?" Russet Potato Face responds with a double-entendre about his inability to satisfy her sexually.
Bacardi and Cola meet up, and Cola can't believe Jack is helping Bashir. Cola can't forgive Bashir for the thousands of people he killed. "It's not your call to make," Jack says. "It's not my call to make. Nothing means anything any more. Life is pain. Life is only pain. [his large bang falls over his right eye, he jerks his head back to put the bang in place] We're all taught to believe in happy fairytale endings. But there's only blackness. Dark, depressing loneliness that eats at your soul."
Meanwhile, Bashir continues to offer clues to his whereabouts. "Hey, look, we're passing
Back at Casa Everyman,
08:32:23 to 08:37:13
A group of prisoners are marched out in orange jumpsuits to board a bus. Andrew Sullivan immediately begins penning a passionate screed about how no one looks good in orange, and so this is clearly torture.
John Caged Weasel informs President Chapelle that his sister, Cynthia McKinney Chapelle was arrested. Cynthia McKinney and her aide/boyfriend Gee Wally are marched into a DC-Area detention facility that is apparently located in southern
08:41:35 to 08:48:52
Bashir drops off the Handler in a commercial-industrial district somewhere in
The Handler has gone into a U-Stor-It, and quickly locates a locker filled with Guns-n-Ammo, as well as Hustler, Teen Beat, and many years of National Geographic. Chiggy wants to move in and arrest him now, and get to Imhotep through interrogation. Jack disagrees, saying, as he often does, that there's no time for this, But despite his never being wrong about anything, no one listens to Jack. A squad of SWAT commandos or something move in to make the arrest. People start shooting. The terrorist drops a grenade. Things explode. Everything in the storage locker is destroyed except, miraculously, a laptop with a damaged hard drive and a PDA with a vital piece of intelligence on it, both of which are located within seconds.
President Chapelle makes his decision to release the prisoners. They are awfully diverse for a group of Islamic terrorists. They include a number of women, Eskimos, dwarves, and even a few Hassidic Jews. Apparently, casting either got lazy, or had to fill its Islamic terrorist extra quota in accordance with EEOC guidelines. Anyway, they are marched onto buses under the orders of Tough Military Guy Who Turns Out to be a Traitor.
Back at Terrorist Central, Imhotep thinks longingly of
08:53:15 to 08:59:59
Bill Everyman goes to the address he was instructed to go to to drop off the package. He hands the package off to Nondescript Guy. Nondescript Guy cuts it open. It's filled with money. "It's not enough," says Nondescript Guy, "Go back and get me another $50,000." Bill Everyman begs him. "Please, you don't want people to think you're one of those right-wing racist troglodytes do you?" Nondescript Guy lets Bill Everyman call home,
Meanwhile, Russet Potato Face has decoded part of the files on the hard drive. Bashir recognizes it as the wiring diagram for a nuclear detonator. Immediately, CTU connects the dots and determines that a Russian scientist stole a suitcase nuke. And, furthermore, he's one of the prisoners being released from Palmdale. Military guards begin searching the plane the prisoners have been loaded onto. But the terrorist, Hassan Nemo, is not in the plane. He was hiding back on the bus. And the Tough Military Guy Who Turns Out to be a Traitor is helping him escape.