Carnival of Bauer

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Thursday, August 10, 2006

Bauer2006 Platform #3

Bauer2006 Platform #3 - Jack Bauer will cut moles and waste
No candidate running for Senate in both New York and Connecticut in can do more to cut moles and waste than Jack Bauer. For too long, blowhards on both sides of the aisle have gone to town on pork and for too long, no other Senator was there to pull out a knife and a blowtorch to trim the pork. Until now.

As Senator of New York and Connecticut, Jack Bauer will also use his mole-finding skills in Washington DC. The next time a "leak" is discovered, it will be plugged before the ink dries on the morning edition of The NY Times.

How will Jack deal with leaks you ask? Well let's just say Bauer's Bag o'Tricks includes a car battery, nipple clamps, a Yanni CD, and a towel. For good measure, a hacksaw is on the way.

Let me ask you one question. Do you want a Senator who will name a bridge after himself or one who will blow up a bridge then name the explosion after himself?

Jack Bauer 2006 - Representation with Extreme Persuasion.

Jack Bauer for Senate of both NY and CT approved this message.

Bauer2006 Launch
Bauer2006 Platform #1
Bauer2006 Platform #2

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

If that's Jack Bauer's picture up there holding the gun, uh, tell him to get some basic handgun training. That Hollywood stuff doesn't cut it.