If Jack Bauer was on HEROs what would his power be? Discuss.
Remember, I did not see 24 last week so some of these subplots are new to me.
The following WILL take place between 3-4AM
-Jack will kick some ass - Check
-Jack will find out Josh is his son.
3:05AM - CTU erupts in gunfire. The producers of 24 look at their watches and wonder why there is action 40 minutes earlier than usual.
Jack with a gun (x2)
Jack with the strap of a gun. (2 Points)
Commercial Break
Jack Bauer on The Simpsons next week!
3:14AM
-Worst grandparent ever. "Imagine how much Sesame Chicken we can eat"
More shooting, is this 24?
Jack with a gun
(x3)
It's over Chang, Jack means it Dammit.
For all that Jack Bauer does, you would think he would have some kids that don't need a nanny just to avoid mountain lions and such.
Question, are we counting this as the same combo or a new one?
-This is a new combo. I need to take off my shoes to count all the bodies.
3:20 - Commercial Break
I need a smoke break, this 24 is intense. Espically since I didn't see last week's episode and I don't smoke.
More on The Simpsons
Sunday night, May 20th, the Simpsons will air their 400th and season finale3:33AM
episode. Called “24 Minutes”, this event will be done in 24 style complete with
multi frames and nerve-wracking ticking. Guest stars Kiefer Sutherland and Mary
Lynn Rajskub will play their Monday night alter egos, Jack Bauer and Chloe
O’Brian.
I guess Lisa Miller's boy toy lasts longer the second time around. Now he needs to diddle on her PDA.
Back to Zephram, don't you think Jack Bauer Jr. would stand out a bit in China...being blonde and all?
Miller's boy toy has some strange pillow talk. He's like you are lying...she's like ok 'you have a small penis'. He's like "oh snap".
Weasel is like "Let's call an ambulance...but make them wait awhile...I want to uhhhh debrief Ms. Miller....alone".
Mr. BOWER!!! Hooked on Phonics wants their product back Mr. Chang...
3:35 - Commercial Break
Miss Blogs4Bauer update
Chloe (52%)
Marilyn Bauer (48%)
The Final Four will air this week with the final matchup coming next week.
24 may be over next week, but Fox has plenty of crap for you to watch until Prison Break returns
3:39AM
"Yassir" "Yes Sir"
VtheK needs a nickname for this Division Tool. How about "Buggers"? Morris sucks at mocking people.
My wife is watching the series finale of King of Queens...the main couple (I guess the King and Queen of Queens) got divorced. Sorry for the spoiler.
Daniels - "What were you doing while this was going on"
Tom - "Probably cleaning off the keyboard, sir"
The subcircuit board is still missing, I guess we can guess what Jack will be doing for the next 2 hours.
Here it comes: Jack is your father
Lawhawk - Hmmm.. a nickname for the division guy?President Suburu is a real jerk. What is it with the Russians these days? First PootiPoot and now Suburu.
Bob Slidell... because he's into tps reports.
2 Hours to meet the deadline! It is a good thing Jack has 2 hours left in the day otherwise we'd be screwed.
Commercial Break
Diet Pepsi 90210 commercial = lame. Jack Bauer would totally win the staring contest with the asian kid....he'd make the kid's eyes bleed. Oral B....Olive Garden - the Taco Bell of Italian food...House has a hard case to crack....Acura tunes organs from their cars and offers 1.9% APR...Panasonic for people who are clumsy....NY Lottery - for suckers....SAAB made from crappy Cold War era jets...
Fox5NY Useless 24 Story - THERE IS NO USELESS STORY TONIGHT!!!
3:54
What did Daniels just say?
Philip Bauer is on the phone
-What is it?
It is a telecommunications device that connects people, but that is not important right now.
Philip Bauer has made more deals today than Jerry Maguire.
Uncle Jack....Uncle Jack....Son....Son.....Doyle....JOSH.....
3:59....4:00
Awards for this episode:
-TOP 5 Episode of 24
-Earliest Kill by Jack Bauer
-First Kill by Morris
-Worst commercial (Pepsi)
Next Week: Explosions, Jack, Josh...Man it will be a doozy.
101 comments:
Is it truly a Bauer family reunion without a bloodbath? Besides, the bloodbath begins in earnest next week.
Also, did we switch to Eastern time?
We're definitely having fun tonight. It's obvious that Jack's power would be to get the truth out of anybody...oh wait a minute, that's one of his powers at CTU.
Am I the only one here early, or is everybody in the Philly area watching Godzilla take its revenge on the Phillies?
He'd say 'Damnit', and the nuclear bomb would soon be in his hands
God Mode?!?!?
Is viewer discretion ever not advised?
HD feed pixelating on me - DAMMIT!
Bauer's power would be the ability to go 24 hours without having to go to the bathroom and using that pent up energy to kill people with a word.
Ok, I like Terri Bauer far better then Marilyn Bauer.
At least Terri didn't ask like a toddler.
That unnamed ChiCom is going to regret hitting Jack.
Is there such a thing as a secure room at CTU?
Over the Air HD > Cable or satellite HD.
FACT!
Who knew that Al had it in him?
ONE!
TWO by choke and neck snap.
Ricky Stratton too late as usual.
Over-the-air (no QAM tuner, and the HD cable tuner isn't with the computer).
Niiiice.
Where did Nadia and Morris learn that?
And Where the heck did doyle come from? I don't think the timing works out...
Kill those monkeys...
I totally saw Jack do a Combo Breaker
So, what's the subtotal? I had one by gun, one by broken neck.
Isn't the action supposed to occur 45 minutes past the hour? Jack Bauer rule #45
Dammit, Jack doesn't need any special powers. He's the man.
Case in point, choke into neck snap. The show is back on track.
2 hours 45 minutes of real action.
HELL YEAH!!
Do it, Jack Jr. Tell Zephram to go to Hell.
cool...upcoming Simpson's 400th episode done in 24 style of some sort...
Great China! Wow! When do we leave Gramps?
Lol. Your father's mistakes.
Zephram definitely on the Free Trade Kool-Aid. Unfortunately, he doesn't quite realize the Chinese are xenophobic.
As usual, Jack's the first one out of the hole - Stratton would've been too late.
Was that a Jack or Ricky kill?
Sliding kill? Sweet - that should count for style points...
That one was definitely a Jack kill. I may have underestimated the pool guess.
kill-counter be climbing...
nice kick josh!
Has Jack reloaded?
Jack Jr has his father's right leg.
ANOTHER! Question, are we counting this as the same combo or a new one?
More gunfire? With less than 20 minutes of showtime?
This episode is gonna be sweet
Who fragging cares about his Mr. Bauer Sr?
Josh is too much like his sister - screwing up the program before Jack could end Cheng.
Little bastard.
At least we're 2.5 hours from the end of Papa Bauer.
Was it 5 guys between the two bouts of Chinese cooking or was it 6? In all of this excitement, I've lost count. But seeing that Jack Bauer is the best ass-kicker in the world, and he'll blow your head clean off, you have to ask yourself one question, Lick Poo. Do I feel lucky? Well, do you, punk?
Damn Ruskies. Why don't they just go to war with the Chinese?
You asked for a smoke break? You got one. Frau Blucher slows things down with Jim Jones as the Rooskies move to it.
And now I need a cold shower.
Miller is going to die...
And I won't be sorry.
yes this could be it...
Cold shower indeed.
Ah, this would have been suspensful without the Tommy Narration.
Breck Girl definitely can't get (it done fast) enough, and Weasel Cage is horrified.
"Gentlemen, he is taking the bait." How can anyone who watched Breck Girl and Ann Coulter be called a "gentleman"?
Flashbacks to the first season, where that girl knifes Johnny Cool guy
Is that Daniel Jackson?
damn...
Martha Logan redux?
Breck must be a largemouth bass; he sniffed out the hook.
Ann Coulter was definitely the right nickname; she wass taking out the Breck Girl with extreme prejudice until her lack of body mass became evident.
Lol @ Steve.
Does DC have the death penalty?
Mr. Bauer tells Mr. Cheng how it is... I might like this guy.
"Are we over finally?"
line of the year.
Non-stop action. Hell yeah!!
Zephram certainly loves to threaten countries - including the one where he was planning on taking an extended vacation.
This guy has plans within plans. Schemes within schemes. And the only thing standing in his way is Muadib. Oh wait, I mean Jack.
Miss Blogs4Bauer update
Chloe (52%)
Marilyn Bauer (48%)
The Final Four will air this week with the final matchup coming next week.
I think we should term it the 'Fantastic Four' instead.
Great. Another jerk from Divsion.
MAAN I miss George Mason.
3 am is good for but two things; the lack of good judgement, and Division showing up to muck things up.
VtheK needs a nickname for this Division Tool.
When did Morris become a defending attourney?
I wonder who is more protective of their intellectual property - the NCAA or Marvel Comics.
Al giving advice to Aywana, who's acting like a Token.
Time? What time do you think you have?
NCAA probably has more lawyers, if they ever take a break from prosecuting the Seminoles.
Why the Heck does Booth care a frig about Miller anymore?
Ooooh, Zombie Coulter. Jim Jones doesn't like that, but I'm sure Zombie Palmer would.
Hmmm.. a nickname for the division guy?
Bob Slidell... because he's into tps reports.
I've got 03:45 and counting.
Lick Poo is out, and here comes the truth about Jack Jr.
I feel it also.
Wow. Such product placement for Cisco.
Almost makes you wonder...
Uncle Jack, what's the deal with grandpa?
oh my...
Whats with this Russian nut?
Oh. 2 Hours. Awful conivient...
Threats-counterthreats, the Presidential edition. Subaru wants proof by 5:50 or he takes out an American military base.
you have to the end of the season...
If I were the President, I would laugh in the Russian's face and dare them to attack with their unarmed warheads and cardboard tanks.
How long has "90210" been off the air? No wonder why Pepsi lost the Cola Wars.
What the heck was that pepsi commercial?
And What is a cola taste>
Ooh. Tom brings the big news.
Fox5NY Useless 24 Story - THERE IS NO USELESS STORY TONIGHT!!!
Mr. Bauer strikes again!
'I am sorry, you must ask the right questions!'
He just needs to say that once...
No Fox5NY story? Un-fragging-believable.
Zephram has a direct line to Jim Jones, and he's playing, "Let's Make A Deal".
Zephram wants the Full Mole Pardon Treatment. Frau Blucher nails it - "He's a sociopath", and Weasel Cage agrees.
Psociopath. Big words! Booth isn't intemidated.
beat da snot out of him...
Doyle a traitor? He just betrayed Jack...
Translation from Jack - Zephram Cochrane is no father of mine.
Ricky Stratton taking Jack Jr for a VP-approved choo-choo ride. Big mistake.
off to China to live the life of the Great Leader...
Ooh, looks like Zombie Michelle is going to get her revenge on RPF.
So we just tossed almost 23 hours of plot work out the window...
Probably wasn't too heavy a load to chuck through the glass.
Earliest kill by jack?
Are you sure?
Did anyone catch the end of that conversation with Daniels, Hayes, and Lennox? Fox in eastern PA was broadcasting an alert and it killed the sound completely.
The one with the psciopath?
Everything after psychopath into the conversation that led to Josh being taken away.
Memory's a bit hazy, but Fox will have this thing up on the official "24" site by tomorrow morning.
Have some more photos while you're at it!!
http://tv.yahoo.com/24/show/28479/photos/7
Highly-suspect unofficial recall of that convo - Weasel Cage agreed that Zephram was a sociopath, but said they needed to do the deal anyway. Blucher asked, "What about Jack Jr?", and Jim Jones (I think) said, "What about all the other young kids that the Rooskie attack will take out?"
Then I must not have missed anything important. I didn't know if anyone was giving villain names or anything of interest.
It's going to have to be a quick mop up.
And Wayne's still on the life support, too.
CHLOE WINS!!! (That's like the Mariners beating the Yankees!!! Or the Seattle Seahawks winning!!!!)
CAN'T WAIT FOR 24 ON THE WEST COAST!!!! (I've read enough.)
Earliest kill by jack?
Are you sure?
It was pretty damn early...
So much for the return of Tony, or the truth about Josh Bauer. I guess to make up for it Jack will have to take out his own father.
Ok, I had Jack down for 7 kills in the first 20 minutes.
Is that a record?
Josh is Phillip Bauer's son.. It's Chinatown, Jake, I mean Jack.
Of the top moments of the season, that had all of them except a body swinging from a chain and a vampire bite to the neck.
Don't forget the best non-Bauer line ever - "Is it over, finally?!!" as Lennox can't deal with Lisa Miller bumping nasties either... UGH.
Bullseye yeah him, Lennox was shocked a man could last that long.
I'm going with Phillip Bauer is Josh's dad. The way Marilyn's eyes flashed when she said, "Did she tell him anything else?"
FYI: Next Monday is Chloe O'Brian Appreciation Day!
Could be her last day!!
Make sure you learn how to use your computer better!!!
Thank you very nice..
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