The Carnival of Tony's Not Dead

The Carnival of Bauer™!!! Week 3

Last week we had The Carnival of Edgar™ to mourn Edgar's passing. So this week it only makes sense that we'd have the Carnival of Tony, right?

Well, you haven't been reading enough Blogs4Bauer—shame on you. As I explained in a previous post, I'm in the middle of a full-blown power trip, and have no intention of admitting that Tony is dead until we see his lifeless body with no efforts to save him, or at the very least here Jack tell somebody else that Tony is dead. Remember, Tony may very well be dead—but it may only be clinical death, and he just needs a shot of something else to bring him back. Or maybe that was just a huge dose of heroin and his system is handling it just fine (as we all know it would). I'm just saying, he might not be dead for good.

But let's get on to The Carnival of Tony's Not Dead™!!!

First off is Doug at Below the Beltway, bringing us a tale of someone else who may very well be dead: Donald Trump, as a result of his choice to go head-to-head with Jack—never a good choice if you ask me. For some reason, Doug thinks he gets to submit twice, so he also sent us a post entitled "Say It Ain't So Tony." Well, I'm not Tony, but, here goes nothing: It ain't so!

And then there's Bibi at Pointless Banter, who shows us what it might take to get yourself killed by surly construction workers, in her effort to explain What Would Jack Do if he were living her life. I think that probably the first thing he tried wouldn't be calling his mom (or Chapelle, for that matter), but otherwise everything seems realistic.

And then there's FIAR at Radioactive Liberty, who presents his Interview with a Hobbit. I think he rides Samwise a little hard, but overall the interview seems fair and balanced.

Denis at Provoking the Muse gives us his episode summary and future predictions for next week. He seems to think that Jack might raise Tony from the dead—which means the rest of his predictions are bound to be true as well, so check it out.

Jivin J, at JivinJehoshaphat feels the need to air some grievances regarding the plotline surrounding Samwise's keycard. He hits most of the big points, but his analysis is a bit off, I think. For example, he asks if the terrorists came up with this spur-of-the-moment, how did they figure out about Lynn's junkie sister with such haste; if had been planning this for a while, how did they know to jump Lynn since he only transferred over to CTU that morning? Well, simple: there's a mole at division, who sent Lynn over in the first place!!

Yesterday, Wyatt gave us his review of 24:The Game. Well, here's an in-depth liveblog of the first hour of the game from Rob Carr, at UnSpace. If you don't play video games, or don't want to spend the money, this is the best way I can think of to find out what happens. Nicely done, Rob.

Jimmy K. at but that's just my opinion presents New Characters and Jack Facts, another installment his apparently weekly series.

Mr. Random at Lolzerama demands that Jack increase his violence next week. He also picks up and repeats some of the funniest moments from last week.

Jeff at Peace Like a River offers his look back at this week's episode. I hope you like irreverance.

Pantrygirl at Now What? complains—like a lot of our commenters have—that she's seen all the good people die. She's right that a lot of good people have died. But Tony's not dead yet, so there's no reason to worry!

Jwookie at Cake or Death does his weekly thing, and points out that the terrorists made Jack cry. I'm still not sure why that happened, since Tony's not dead. Maybe it's the stress of having his really hot daughter point out that when she's around him "people die." Man, talk about a God complex—does she really think she's the one determining whether or not people are dead? Doesn't she know that's my job? He also claims that someone got caught in LA traffic—but I find that pretty hard to believe on this show.

Karen of Scottsdale over at The View From My Chair (whose entry was over 12 hours late, so she owes me one for including her), also picks up on the fact that Jack Bauer Cried. I'm still not sure why that happened, though—maybe he's just upset that Robocop got away, or he still hasn't dealt with the fact that Edgar's been dead for an hour. I can't think of any other reason why he'd cry.

And last, but certainly not least, we have Emperor Misha I's Is that gas I smell? over at Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler. My favorite line is the Homeland Security woman's response when the VP asks her how to handle the fact that CTU has been compromised:

I suggest that we move in, drag out the dead bodies and turn me into Fuhrer For Life of the CTU, thus making sure that the show’s ratings won’t suffer from the absence of a bureaucratic fool with ulterior motives who can screw up everything on a regular basis.

Amazing how, moments after the previous bureaucratic fool dies in a rainstorm of putrid pink puke, a new one arrives on the scene. Read the whole thing, I guarantee that you'll laugh at least twice.

And that's it for The Carnival of Tony's Not Dead™, Bauers and Bauerettes. Make sure you read what everyone has to say, and if you enjoy any of it, give us a link. We provide the Carnival of Bauer™ each week as a public service, but we need your help spreading the word that it's here. Feel free to use this image:

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Previous Carnivals:
Announcing the Carnival of Bauer™
The Carnival of Bauer — Week 1
The Carnival of Edgar™