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Wednesday, October 25, 2006

A 24 Wish List

Since the upcoming season of 24 will almost certainly involve China (as well as uber-villain Eddie Izzard), I had an idea for the casting director.

BSG's Grace Park would be perfect as Jack's love interest.

Just a thought.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Liveblogging - 24 Trailer Talk

Liveblogging - 24 Trailer Talk
Fox will air a sneak peek at Season 6 today at 3:00pm EST with a web clip. They're also showing it over the jumbo-tron in Times Square, which makes no sense.

Check back here at 3pm as Blogs4Bauer will live-blog the preview and follow-up with a kill counter and analysis.

24 - Season 6 Sneak Peek - 3:00pm EST

Here's a little something to tide you over till then.

Watch the webclip here!
(just hit the play button twice after the Toyota commercial)

(Hat tip - jwookie for the clip)
3:00:04 - Jack Bauer PSA - "Our fans rock". Where's the B4B mention?
3:00:18 - President Wayne Palmer!!!.....Hell Yeh. Adams, Roosevelt, Bush, and Palmer
3:00:23 - Muslim suicide bombers in the first 20 seconds of the trailer. Someone call CAIR.
A Threat Will Rise
Fear Will Grow

3:00:23 - Explosion #1
3:00:23 - Explosion #2
3:00:34 - Buchanan just said 114 people died in St. Louis. Damn and they never got to see the Cardinals win the World Series. Ohh and the kill counter for the trailer just exploded like a terrorist heading to meet his 72 virgins.
3:00:35 - Explosion #3
Our Only Hope (let me guess - Jack Bauer?)
"Do you understand the difference between dying for something and dying for nothing. Today I can die for something" - Jack Bauer
3:00:46 - HOLY Jeebus.... Jack Bauer has a mullet.
3:00:48 - Jack Bauer looks like Dr. Richard Kimble
3:00:51 - Everyone now: Bacardi...and Cola
3:00:56 - For all you ladies, Jack Bauer without a shirt
3:01:06 - Explosion #4
3:01:09 - Explosion #5
3:01:10 - Did Token just say "thousands of civilians are dead"? Season 6 Kill Counter just surrendered.
For America to Survive
3:01:12 - Jack Bauer on the subway.
3:01:14 - For all you nerds, Chloe is back.
3:01:15 - "Jack Bauer has to be sacrificed" How many times have they played out that storyline?
Jack Bauer
3:01:20 - Jack Bauer sans mullet.

3:01:26 - Explosion #6
3:01:35 - Jack Bauer yelling.
3:01:45 - Explosion #7
3:01:45 - This season, we stop counting bodies. Instead we count explosions. I count 7 already.

Summary: America is under attack from terrorists. Jack Bauer is our only hope. Along the way, things blow up and people die. Jack Bauer is betrayed and faces death. Jack Bauer also yells a bunch.

What did you think?

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Counterpoint: Jack doesn't need you anymore, heroin. He has me.
By Adrenaline

Well, well, well, look who came crawling back: Heroin. You miss Jack Bauer? I can't say that I am surprised, but I can say that you're wasting your breath. Jack is with me now, and we have a bond stronger than any needle or tourniquet. With me, Jack gets high on life . . . and fresh corpses. I am there for him, and I support him. When Jack is feeling down, I don't offer him a syringe; I suggest we go snap the neck of a terrorist. When Jack is bored, I offer him a mole's nipples and a live wire. And you? Just take a look at your history with Jack:

You never treated Jack right. How many times did you call him the day after your get-togethers? Did you even call to say you got home safely? He was worried sick!

You embarrassed him when you showed up drunk at the CTU ball. Cripes, you made a grand entrance in your backless gown, and then tripped over Bill Buchanan during your inebriated twirl!

You cheated on him numerous times with floozies like Kate Moss and Samwise Gamgee's sister. How many times did you call Jack "Marion Barry?" Ten? Fifteen?

Jack is over you, and now you need to get on with your life. I trust you received your LP records and your love letters. Now, please leave my Jack alone.

Point: I Know That You Want to Come Back to Me
by Heroin

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Point: I Know That You Want to Come Back to Me

Point: I Know That You Want to Come Back to Me
by Heroin

Hey Jack Bauer, remember me? I'm sure you do, we spent a lot of time together. I know you don't have much time so I'll get to the point. Jack, I know you want to come back to me, come on and chase the dragon just once more.

Jack, we had some fun in Mexico - yes we did, denial is the first sign of a real problem that can only be cured by some sweet chiva. Remember that time you were on a 2 day bender and ran nude through that village outside Culiacán? How about when you spent an hour interrogating a goat on the whereabouts of The Three Amigos? He almost broke, maybe next time buddy. How about now?

You're under a great deal of stress, that's why you should let a little black tar take the edge off. It couldn't hurt your current situation - in the hull of a ship headed to China.

What are you waiting for, we don't have much time? The dragon won't chase itself.

Counterpoint: Jack doesn't need you anymore, heroin. He has me.
By Adrenaline

Previous Point-Counterpoint Posts
Point - New York and Connecticut Need Their Own Senators. by CBS Anchor Katie Couric
Counterpoint - Katie Couric Needs To Shut Her Pie Hole. by Chloe O'Brian

Point- I would make a kick-ass CTU Agent! by President Bush
Counterpoint- If I Were At CTU, None Of These Attacks Would Have Happened. by John F. Kerry

Point - Bauer, You're Out! by Jimmy "Da Hammer" Lopez
Counterpoint - Without Jack Bauer, the only cup you'd be drinking from is between your legs!- by Peter Gammons

Point- "We do not need Rack Bauer" by Chinese General Tso
Counterpoint - Jack's Coming To Thin Out Your Herd by President Logan

Point - It's time to give credit where credit is due. by Jack Bauer's manpurse
Counterpoint - That man-purse makes you look like a sissy. by Mr. Blackwell

Point - Jack Bauer's Threats Will Not Stop Iran's Nuclear Plans. by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
Counterpoint - Keep It Up And We'll Give You Nuclear Weapons ASAP - Courtesy Of The B-2 Bomber. by Donald Rumsfeld

Point - Dude, I Wouldn't Hit That, Again. by Spenser Wolff
Counterpoint - A Guy Who Is Hung Like A Chinese Church-mouse Shouldn't Run His Pie-hole So Much. by Chloe O'Brian

Point - Don't Hold Your Breath; Heller's Dead. by Ted Kennedy
Counterpoint - Anything Is Possible. by Mary Jo Kopechne

Point - I'm Going to Kill Jack Bauer! by Christopher Henderson
Counterpoint - Henderson, You're As Good As Dead! by The Grim Reaper

Point- Jack Bauer Cannot Help Recover Your Money, Mr. Rakotozafy (I can) - by Nina Myers
Counterpoint- Everything Nina Myers says is bullsh*t. - by Jack Bauer

Point- Audrey Raines: Kick The Jack Habit Today! - by Dr. Phil (on loan from - Audrey, stand by your man! - by Mary Jo Buttafuoco

Point - Thin Mints are an addictive narcotic - by Jack Bauer
Counterpoint - Thin Mints Are Only The Beginning - by Vladimir Bierko

Point - I'm going to make it! by Random Guard
Counterpoint - Nah, you're not. - by Death

Point - CTU needs better training for their security guards before something bad happens
Counterpoint - My teenage daughter could have stopped every incursion into CTU!

Point- 24:The Game Will Lead to More Violence
Counterpoint - Violence Makes The World Go 'Round

Point - Jack Bauer could not have shot down one of our AS 350 Ecureuil Helicopters with a handgun
Counterpoint - A redneck with a squirt gun could shoot down your euro-trash.

Point - It's Time To Turn Jack Bauer Over To The Chinese
Counterpoint - Confucius Say, "Man With Wandering Groin Accomplishes Little"

Point - Impeach Weasel, Dennis Kucinich For President
Counterpoint - Fox should fight off impeachment like Shelley Winters fought off diet cola

Point - They are already illegally wiretapping Jack Bauer's cell phone, whose next?
Counterpoint - The U.S. government does not violate our civil rights enough!

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Season 6 Trailer

You are on notice. Mondays starting in January are now booked.

Season 6 Premier
Sunday January 14th (8-10pm EST)
Monday January 15th (8-10pm EST)
Hours 5-24 will air Monday's at 9pm EST uninterrupted until May!

Also, in 13 days Fox releases the first look at Season 6.

A web-only trailer will be aired on:

Blogs4Bauer will live-blog the trailer and post our review/kill counter shortly after.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Top Ten Jack Bauer Pet Peeves

10. Smoking.
9. Lack of posting on Blogs4Bauer.
8. Rude people.
7. Eyeballs that don't pop out in one piece.
6. Long lines at the airport.
5. Long lines at the CTU armory.
4. Fat chicks.
3. When Curtis plays his 50 Cent CD too loud.
2. People who put ketchup on a hot dog.

And the number one Jack Bauer pet peeve is . . .

1. When Steinway won't sell you loose piano wire.

Friday, October 06, 2006

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