Counterpoint: Henderson, You're As Good As Dead!
by The Grim Reaper
Christopher, I for one can truly understand your hatred of Jack Bauer. Hell (no pun intended), hate is one of our "happy places" here. You have no idea how much I wanted to off those slackers Bill and Ted, but sometimes you just have to let things go.
For you see, Jack Bauer is one of my favorite pawns in the battle between Heaven and Hell. On the one hand, that wussy jackass God loves Bauer because of all his "do-goodery." On the other (and more important) hand, Bauer - like the Marines - kills everything he sees, and keeps Hell packed with fresh souls. Sorry, Chris; Jack Bauer stays.
Oh, and by the way, I HATE Hardees!
Point: I'm Going to Kill Jack Bauer!
by Christopher Henderson