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Sunday, March 25, 2007

Miss Blogs4Bauer - Round 1

Hi, I am Sanjaya Malakar, the next American Idol, William Shatnerasked Ryan Seacrest to take over again this week, but Seacrest was busy so he asked Bob Barker, and Barker asked Chuck Woolery, and then Chuck asked Ryan Seacrest and then he asked me to host this week's match up of the Miss Blogs4Bauer Contest. I just hope I don't screw it up, but America loves me so it wouldn't matter much if I did.

Last week we got close to 60 million votes and America decided to send Nadia Yassir to the next round with 69% of the vote!

This week's match up pairs a woman who is crazy about Jack Bauer and one that is just as crazy about cocaine. Marilyn Bauer is best known for mothering the heir to Jack Bauer's throne while Jenny McGill is best known for turning tricks behind the dumpster across the street from CTU to fund her addiction to coke, heroin, and strawberry flavored Charleston Chews. Count me in for at least two of those!

The results for this match up will be posted next Monday (4/2). The next match up will pit Evelyn Martin with Martha "I hate kiwi so much" Logan. That battle will also begin on 4/2.

Click Here for an updated bracket.

Name: Jenny McGill
Status: Dead
Occupation: Plot filler/mole enabler
Strengths: None
Weaknesses: Almeida-esq cocaine habit.
Curious detail: Her sale of Lynn's key card led to the deaths of 54 people at CTU, well 56 if you count Edgar.

Name: Marilyn Bauer
Status: Widowed (and loving every moment of it)
Occupation: Raising Jack Bauer Jr.
Strengths: Instantly became everyone's favorite character after telling Jack that Audrey got a "silent clock" while trying to save him in China.
Weaknesses: Hopelessly in love with balding men.
Curious detail: Currently the only love interest of Jack's (past and present) that's still alive.

Who Should Move On?
Marilyn Bauer

Jenny McGill

Click Here for Results


steveegg said...

Jack just called; he says that if a crackhead makes it to round 2 over the mother of his son, he'll fly the next nuke direct to those responsible, and this time it will explode, dammit.

L P said...

This isn't even a contest. I suppose if you've got some sort of drug addict hobbit sister fetish...

Anonymous said...

OMG, Jenny McGill?! Thanks for the LOL on this dreary Monday morning!

yankz said...

I don't really care about this one, but Samwise's sister looks exactly like Honey Bunny from Pulp Fiction. Eww.

yankz said...

BTW, you forgot about Kate Warner. Or did I miss her dying or something? And Diane Huxley?