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Monday, April 17, 2006

24 Live Blog Midnight to 1:00 AM

Good evening boils and ghouls. I'm V the K, and I lost today's round of naked buck-buck. The LiveBlog is mine.

12:00 It's Bauer Time. Have we seen Jack eat or go to the bathroom in any of the previous episodes?

12:01 So, on one side, there's Logan and the Department of Homeland Security searching for Jack. On the other side, Jack + Diet Cola + Chiggy Killer. Um, the Washington Generals had a better chance of beating the Globetrotters.

12:05 Is Heller in a Lockheed Jetstar. Classic! That's just what Pussy Galore flew in Goldfinger.

12:06 What's on Jack's iPod. Elwy and the Tree Weasels, singing the classic hit "Let's Whack David Palmer." Secretary Heller ----> Not surprised that Logan is a weasel.

12:09 SMOOCHIES!

12:10 Heller throat chops Jack, takes his iPod, and says he's going to take down Logan himself, because exposiing his perfidy would rip this country apart. Puh-lease. That's Hillary Talk.

12:16 Time to play "Spy on Chloe," a game perfected by Edgar in the bushes outside Chloe's bedroom window.

12:17 Anita Hill is wearing a wire. I bet it's small black and curly.

12:18 Chloe's call is tracked to Van Nuys Airport! The Washington Generals score!

12:22 Now, President Logan claims to be sending the military to get Jack. If he is sending the entire 101st airborne, it might be a fair fight.

12:23 No! Dick Cheney, Never corner a frightened weasel! They can turn on you at any moment!

12:30 Cool. Chloe's pick-pocket trick with Miles CTU Shopper's Club card is even better than Matt Broderick's tape recorder trick in Wargames.

12:31 Oh, no! Stopped in the hallway by Anita Hill. Maybe Chloe can use her awesome people skills to resolve this situation.

12:33 The SecDef drives his own car? Then that must have been Rumsfeld who cut me off on the Beltway this morning! And where does he get a rental at 12:30 at night anyway?

12:40 Now, Heller corners the weasel.

12:41 "Your chair is not a throne." True, if it was a throne, it would flush.

12:42 Oh, Gawd, the moonbat writers are back. "It's all about the O-I-I-I-I-I-L!"

12:43 Logan looks like "I wonder if I could tear out his throat with my sharp, needle-like teeth."

12:44 Mary Todd and Red Foreman's cell phone? I don't get it.

12:46 Who's that guy? I think his name is Bauer. He's involved in the plot in some way.

12:47 Ah, the old "Melt the handcuffs on a steampipe, then bash the guard's head in with the door trick." Classic.

12:51 No, it's not a Jetstar. It only has single engine pods, not dual pods. Never mind.

12:52 A climatic shootout at the end of the hour? Never saw that coming. I wonder if it will end with a cliffhanger.

12:54 "There's been too much killing today." You should know, pal. You did most of it.

12:55 He cut Audrey's nose! She'll bleed out in seconds.

12:59 Turns out his chair was a throne, and Heller just got flushed.

46 comments:

Anonymous said...

v the k is the mole

lawhawk said...

Sweet - this can be a good episode because you know who isn't blogging it.

Robocop is a little rusty in the gunfire category. Ought to get his aim recalibrated. Jack could help with that...

lawhawk said...

It's all about the oil. Go figure. Some memes are too easy to use...

lawhawk said...

Everything's going to be okay? Are you kidding me?

Not 2 seconds later... go figure.

Anonymous said...

"my god you're serious". Nothing gets by Chiggy. Nothing.

CGrim said...

selling out Jack Bauer is approximately 7.342 times more foolish than selling out the President.

Anonymous said...

Anyone see the preview to The Sentinal? Tell me how it is not 24? Besides being set in DC.

Anonymous said...

OK...so he jacks Jack, and is heading to take on Weasel mano-a-mano?

Might as well tick up the Kill Counter now.

lawhawk said...

Oh, political ramifications, so the CTU guys aren't good. We're going to use military.

Yeah, that sounds normal. Or rational.

Anonymous said...

Sprint product placement #1.

Anonymous said...

Cheney likes his rooms set at 86 degrees and all Sprint phones set to Fox News.

lawhawk said...

Logan grew a pair? When did this happen? And Novic is treading on thin ice.

Anonymous said...

Bauer presents "special circumstances". Classic Logan.

lawhawk said...

the man:

'Special circumstances' see also:

Jack Bauer warps the time space continuum every time he wants to know where the bomb is.

Jack Bauer makes James Bond look like a pussy. Galore.

Anonymous said...

We got farked.

Anonymous said...

Once again...we near 45 minutes past the hour. The killing minutes draw near. tck tck tck.

Anonymous said...

What is V the K doing? Taking a dump? A hell of a lot has gone on since the throat chop--get to it!

Anonymous said...

Chloe picks pockets too?

lawhawk said...

Hmmm, is Logan under control of the Goa'uld? Maybe Chiggy Killa better become acquainted with the worms to know when to spot 'em.

Either that or grab a pair of real dark sunglasses (they live!)

Anonymous said...

Worst martial law ever.

Heller, Audrey, Chiggy, Henderson can just drive around.

Jack can drive around in a bullet-riddled cop car.

Anonymous said...

tyler is the mole!!!!! He is in a flank 2 position setup as VtheK.

CGrim said...

gross.

the First Lady wants to get laid.

Anonymous said...

Is it just me, or does that music really sound like something from the Lord of the Rings?

lawhawk said...

Sec. Def confronts Weasel. That can't lead to anything good.

All about the oil. Gaaaaaa.

And weasel is about to have yet more blood on his hands... if looks could kill that is...

Anonymous said...

NOT THE JAMES BOND MUSIC AGAIN!

lawhawk said...

Gaaa - the cheesy 70s blacksploitation music is back. And so is Chiggy!

Anonymous said...

(slap my forehead)

I get it. It is all about the oil.

CGrim said...

nooooo! they got Aaron!!

Anonymous said...

ummmmm why didn't jack bauer grab the wire cutters in the first place?

That was nice of the guards to leave the wire cutters next to Jack and Audrey. They probably were promoted from CTU security last season.

Anonymous said...

45 minutes past the hour. I'll go down to the basement and jumpstart the kill counter.

Don't let me down Jack.

lawhawk said...

Sweet - stand next to a gas tank filled with jet fuel. Bright.

Real bright. As in explosively bright.

Anonymous said...

"Our Government has no integrity!"

So true....

lawhawk said...

Well played Weasel.... and Heller should have listened to Jack....

CGrim said...

the Veep isn't stupid, he knows that it all suddenly makes sense if Logan is complicit...

CGrim said...

and I thought it was a good episode, because all the characters I was getting more and more disappointed in are finally starting to piece things together

Anonymous said...

1
2
3
4 - Bad Guys - Jack

5 - Heller's guard (didn't see that one coming) - Bad guys

6
7 - Bad Guys - Explosion/Jack

7.5 - Audrey....

Also did Red die?

Anonymous said...

Next week: SecDef Heller's dead. Audrey has a gun. Martha is taken care of.

Oh and Fox5 does not lead with an asnine 24 story they would air as the last segment.

Anonymous said...

Awww, crap, I'm probably gonna be in a tent on the beach somewhere on the Pacific coast next Monday.

Anonymous said...

Farkers are saying they saw Victor Drazen in the preview for next week. Anyone see it?

Best villan ever.

Anonymous said...

Uhh... nevermind.

Jack puts his gun on Drazen, and the two stand silent for a few seconds, Drazen with his hands over his head in surrender, but abject defeat clearly written on his face. In blind rage, Bauer viciously empties his magazine into the man, even firing on Drazen's corpse as it floats in the bay water, stopping only when out of ammo.

steve said...

this weeks summary of 24isms - plot holes and the things that could only happen on 24 - is now up at thoughtsonline

al said...

Hey Grim - I only counted 5. 2 coming off the helo, Hellers guard, and then 2 in the explosion.

Anonymous said...

*YAWN* What a dull dull dull dull dull dull dull dull episode. What a waste of one hour.

CGrim said...

man, what a bunch of whiners. I still maintain that it was a good episode, character-wise

al said...

man, what a bunch of whiners. I still maintain that it was a good episode, character-wise

I have to agree. I enjoyed this episode.

As for my earlier objection to the kill counter I watched the end again and counted 6 confirmed and 2 probable (1 bad guy and Audry)

Anonymous said...

Audrey's not dead or near-dead. They showed her in the preview for next week.